When children are feeling anxious, it is hard for them to pay attention to anything other than that feeling. This can be very disruptive during the school day, as well as during homework time at night. To help your child be prepared to focus on their homework, it is worthwhile to spend time managing their anxiety first. Below are some simple steps you can take to help your child reduce their feelings of anxiety before sitting down to do homework.

1. EXERCISE: Moving our bodies is an excellent way to relieve tension and decrease feelings of anxiety. Children ideally should be engaging in routine cardiovascular exercise 3-5 days per week to keep their bodies healthy. If your child is not currently physically active, start by talking with their physician about how to get them started, how much and what types of exercise are appropriate for them, and any potential health concerns they may have.

In addition to routine exercise, children also benefit from moving their bodies before being asked to sit down and concentrate. This allows them to release any built up energy or tension, and decrease the amount of anxiety they may be experiencing. Some examples of helpful movements include jumping rope, jumping jacks, walking, and interacting with a yoga ball (rolling, bouncing, etc). Families can experiment with what types and how much exercise is useful, but usually 10-20 minutes is adequate. Movement breaks can also be planned during the homework period as well to further the child’s benefits (10-15 minutes per hour for older children, 5-10 minutes per ½ hr for younger children).

Finally, children can utilize special activities while they are working on their homework to help them maintain their energy and focus. These can include manipulating a fidget toy in their free hand, sitting on a yoga ball instead of a chair, and using a ‘chair band’ (large elastic band that attaches to bottom of their chair and can be stretched using their leg muscles. These movements relieve tension and anxiety, and in most cases help the child focus even better.

2. RHYTHMIC BREATHING: Another important technique to manage anxiety at homework time is to incorporate self-calming strategies. One very influential approach is rhythmic breathing. This involves taking a few minutes of quiet time and paying full attention to one’s breath. I teach children a simple technique (breathe in to a count of 3, pause, breathe out to a count of 3) and encourage them to explore others if they are interested. It is critical that children practice this technique for a few minutes each day, preferably at night as they are relaxing and preparing for sleep, so that their body is able to ‘learn’ the appropriate response. Once they are skilled at rhythmic breathing, they can use it before any anxiety provoking activity to improve their relaxation and focus.

3. REASSURING SELF-TALK: A second useful self-calming technique for homework time is ‘reassuring self-talk’. This involves the child speaking soothing words to themselves, either out loud or within their own mind, about whatever is making them anxious. For example, if a child is worried they will not understand their assignment they may be thinking “I’ll never get it”, or “this is going to take me forever”. These negative thoughts often perpetuate the child’s anxiety, and make it harder for them to focus on the content of their work. If they change those thoughts to more positive, reassuring ones, such as “even though this looks hard, I’m sure I can figure it out” or “All I have to do is try my best”, they will feel calmer and more productive during their homework time. This skill also requires practice and consistent use to make it effective. Encourage your child to write down or say out loud some examples of reassuring thoughts they can use before they sit down to work. It may help to first write down the negative thoughts they are having so they know what positive statements will be helpful.

4. CALM ENVIRONMENT: Schools understand that the environment a child is in has a direct impact on their ability to learn. This is also true at home. Most children require a calm, quiet environment to maintain their focus on their homework and to keep them relaxed. For these children, a quiet room should be selected, telephones should be turned off, IM and texting should be discouraged, and disruptions should be kept to a minimum (other than exercise breaks). If there are multiple siblings trying to work in the same area, questions and conversations should be held in a different location to minimize the impact on each other. Many teens feel they can do homework and text/IM just fine, but in my opinion it decreases their productivity and the quality of their work. Encouraging them to experiment with no distractions for 1-2 weeks often helps them to realize the difference less distraction makes and avoids arguments.

Care should also be taken to keep emotional discussions away from homework time. If possible, discuss daily challenges or emotional issues well before or after children are expected to do their work. If that is not possible, set a time limit for how long the situation will be discussed and then use exercise as a technique to help them relieve tension and re-focus (if necessary).

For children who prefer a less quiet environment, using music or radio talk shows as background noise can be helpful. It is important to not have the tone or content be too upsetting, and non-emotional music creates the most conducive environment for relaxation. This music is available in a variety of mediums, including CD’s, iTunes, Pandora, and even YouTube.

If your child has tried the techniques described above and still feels anxious before homework, please remind them to keep trying! These skills take time to develop, and consistent effort will help them feel better soon.